I’m Feelin’ 32

You guys.

What? In the last few months, for some crazy reason, my readership has gone up and my facebook page has gotten lots of love despite my radio silence. Today, I just got a comment in my Suggestion Box asking me to come back and write again. I didn’t even know anyone missed me!

To be honest, I’ve been wanting to write this post for a while now. I MISS writing. I miss connecting with you all and your struggles while projecting mine out into the internet. I can’t say I am totally back but I will try because I need a place to dump my thoughts and to get some motivation back!

Tomorrow is my 32nd birthday. I cannot even believe that I’ve already circled the sun 32 times but here I am and I’m loving every minute of it.

Source: http://bit.ly/2tCoJP4

Although politically, the last couple of years have been challenging (the election and its results had, for many months, completely wiped me out emotionally), I’ve been able to find hope through my work and through the love I have for my family and the encouraging actions of our next generation. And lots of coffee, swearing and reading.

Since my last post, so much has changed in my personal life! I started a new job almost a year ago moving from event planning at a small, private women’s college in Milwaukee to multicultural recruitment at a large public university. And I gotta say, I’m in love.

What I’ve experienced this year in this new position has felt kind of like falling in love when you least expect it (which I know all about, ask my husband). I didn’t know this was the job I’ve been looking for my whole life until I was in it and doing it! I spent the first half of the year pinching myself daily wondering if I really was doing this work and whether or not my supervisors and teammates made the right choice in offering the job to me (impostor syndrome, I know, I’m working on it). But now, after completing my first full recruitment year, I know I belong in this role doing this work and I wake up everyday ready and willing to go to work. It might sound cliche but it’s true and now that I’m on this side of this elusive professional quest, I can’t help but gush over how luck I am.

Finding the right job does absolute wonders to the mind, body and soul. About 2 months ago, I finally decided to get back on weight watchers. It hasn’t gone as smoothly as I had hoped, with 2 kids and a job that keeps me crazy busy, it has been much more challenging to eat well and work out in the same way back in my Project Unfluff hey days. But just having that app on my phone and something to track my decisions and weekly weigh ins have kind of snapped me back into focus. I hit my lowest weight in adulthood back in 2014 after the birth of my son (yay breastfeeding!) and then shot back up about 30 lbs in the years after that fateful summer. Since getting back on WW in April of this year, I’m down about 11 of those 30 lbs over 2 months and I’m damn proud of my slow and steady progress. It hasn’t been easy and I’m currently in a workout funk right now (more on that in a future post) BUT I’ve been putting a lot less garbage in my body and I’m back in some clothes I haven’t been able to wear the last 2 years.

The most important thing for me right now is that I am being extremely patient with myself. It’s taken a few years for me to appreciate my body for what it is, what it’s done and what it can do. I’ve had to pull back on my fantasies of reaching my idea of “thin” and instead focus on the aspects of weight loss that promote self-care. I’ve learned a lot throughout this process like how certain foods effect my mood and energy levels. Mancakes and I have also put a lot of work into making sure our kids see lots of healthy options at home so that it is their normal, laying the foundation for what I hope are healthier habits than what I had when I was finally out on my own.

My how we’ve grown! No one ever smiles at the same time!

Some of the babysteps I have been taking lately have included:

• Eating as many homemade meals as possible to both save money and lots of calories
• Lunch-hour walks with colleagues when my schedule allows
• Getting a sit-to-stand desk at work
• No caffeine after 4 pm so I can get whatever decent sleep I can in between the 3 year old’s wake-ups (still a struggle after all this time!)

Anything else beyond that at this [re] beginning stage is bonus. And what a sense of relief it is to accept that I’m doing what I can, when I can, wherever I am. What have you been working towards lately? I’d love to hear from you!